Written By: Nikki Threatt

How many times have we seen that big gear bag on the floor with all kinds of stuff spread all over our living room? I know I have, plenty of times. As military wives, it goes without saying that we need to hold it together, be strong, and not show any fear or anxiety. But what about the fact that we are human, and we get scared, we get sad, and we don’t want to go through life without our husbands for 6 or 9 months, or even longer?

My husband did 22 years of active duty and recently retired. I thought for sure we were done with deployments. Woohoo, right? Wrong! His new job is sending him to Iraq. Seriously, I did not think this would be happening again. So here I am with gear all over the living room, the large deployment bag out, and a checklist a mile long.

This isn’t my first rodeo. I have been here many times, and I have always had the mentality of “Hold it together,” “Don’t show him anything’s wrong at home,” etc. But you know what? It’s okay to be salty. It’s okay to think it sucks. And it’s okay to want to stomp your foot and cry like a kid about it. I am not saying that you should completely fall apart, but it is okay not to be perfect.

“God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble.” (Psalm 46: 1-3)

“The Lord is a refuge for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble.” (Psalm 9:9-10)

Let God be your strength. Fall apart, be upset, cry, then lean on the Lord. I am currently taking my own advice as I send my husband back on deployment after thinking we would not be doing this again. GIVE YOURSELF GRACE! It’s okay not to be the “perfect wife.” It’s okay not to have it all together. Our plates can get pretty full, and all the responsibilities we are juggling might come crashing down. Let the Lord be the one to carry your burden.

Written By: Nikki Threatt