I was standing in my kitchen preparing peanut butter and jellies the other day when I found myself thanking God for Ziploc bags. There is a whole series of thoughts that got me to this point but really, it’s been a series of events over several years of my life. Have you ever found yourself thanking God for something that could seem ridiculous to others without the story behind your thankfulness? Assuming I’m not alone or that someday you will be there, let me unfold this thought.
In 2009, my husband and I were stationed in Italy with the military. One of our chaplains from the base chapel coordinated a mission trip to the country of Bulgaria with our youth group and I was given an opportunity to be one of the youth leaders to escort them there. About 40 of us ended up flying to Bulgaria on a trip that would open many of our eyes to a naivety we didn’t even know we had. We had been prepared as much as we could for what we might encounter and given a schedule of events for the whole trip weeks prior to even boarding the plane. I had wanted to go on a mission trip from a really young age so this was a “pinch-me” moment to say the least.
The first moment after we landed in Bulgaria that I realized I had no real idea of what I had gotten myself into was about 2 1/2 hours into our trip. There I was on a crowded bus with no air-conditioning on a very hot day driving on a windy, bumpy dirt road up the side of a mountain. About an hour into the trip I had my first urge to pee but was informed it would be a good amount of time before we would arrive at the villa. An hour and a half later, I pushed past others on the bus to be the first off and ran up to the villa with a very real fear that I would pee my pants if I didn’t get to the bathroom immediately. I impatiently asked our Bulgarian host where the bathroom was and then ran quickly into the bathroom, only to discover the toilet was a hole in the floor. I’ll spare you the embarrassing moments that followed. This was a moment I became exceedingly grateful for toilet paper. That trip was full of impactful moments that would begin to change and shape my mind on the subject of thankfulness and gratefulness. From dirty streets, crime ridden communities, lack of clean water, kids who owned no shoes and clothes that didn’t fit, and so much more. My mind was overwhelmed by all the depravity from basic life essentials.
But it was the little two year old girl who followed us back to our bus for a mile, without a parent, after hosting a Vacation Bible School in their community and was happy as could be just to receive the stickers we brought, that would impact me the most. Why was she so happy with so little? Didn’t she know how unfortunate her circumstances were? The answer is no, she didn’t know what she was living without, she was just happy with what she had. Through this trip and many months and years afterward, I had flashbacks to the communities we encountered and the faces of those we met. My flashbacks would happen when I would begin to complain about things that had become such a normal expectation in my life that I had lost sight of how much of a privilege they were. I began to recognize how shallow my complaining was, how ungrateful of the small things I had become or that I had never even thought to be grateful of before.
Chances are, if you’re reading this, you’re part of the percentage of the world that has grown up in a world of plenty that many can’t even begin to fathom. But are you or have you been narrow minded to your blessings and privileges, just like I was? I don’t say that to make you feel guilty but to bring you into a world view that I was naive to as well. To help you look around at what you have and identify it as really being more than enough. I began to see how many of the “things” in my life were actually a disadvantage rather than an advantage in my faith. It seemed these “things” blinded me to a reality my whole life. Does that confuse you? It definitely confused me too when all of a sudden I found myself wanting to live somewhere other than America, where I started to believe most people were greedy, always wanting more and not even being grateful for what they had or even making use of what they had. But God changed my perspective of that too.
I once was sitting in a chair getting a pedicure and talking to my nail technician. I love knowing people’s life stories. I try to discern from one curious question to the next if I’m making others uncomfortable, but I like digging as deep as they’ll let me. In this moment, it seemed this man had a story to tell and was bursting at the seams for someone to ask and open. I’m embarrassed to say I don’t remember the exact country where this gentleman was originally from, but I know it was in the South Eastern part of Asia. He was around 8 when he first came into America on board a Navy ship. Right now you are thinking “Why was an 8 year old on a Navy ship?”. See where I got curious! The country he grew up in was corrupt and when citizens try to leave by sneaking out on a boat, as many do, they risked being killed immediately by the authority that patrolled the waters there. He recounted the story of seeing his uncle murdered right in front of him, and then being taken to jail for a time at 8 years old… 8 years old! But his father was relentless in wanting to bring his son to freedom. And soon they were boarding another boat in the night to come to our country. On one of the attempts, hungry, thirsty, and afraid, a US navy boat came across them. They were brought on board and transported back to California where his dad would eventually be given citizenship because of a law one of the presidents had put in motion. Can you even imagine what this was like for an 8-year-old boy? He continued to tell me how proud he was to live in America and how generous the American people were. His real-life story of rescue out of the worst of circumstances by the American Navy almost brought tears to my eyes as the wife of a Navy sailor, and in turn helped me discover a new sense of pride in the people of this nation. There are many more details behind his story. Not only details of the past but of the present.
I have to admit that, until he told me how proud he was to even live in America and have the opportunity to work as a nail technician here, I held a bias in my head of pity for him. How shallow of me. Even now, I’m embarrassed to say that was my way of thinking. But I’m grateful for this encounter. I’m grateful he unintentionally taught me a lesson by his gratitude that day. I needed a lesson in gratitude and a reminder that it’s easy to misjudge others when we start to form an opinion about something we know nothing about. To him, being a nail technician in America was the best of circumstances, not the worst. It was a privilege not a punishment.
So as I stood in this house paid for by the U.S. Navy, in this beautiful kitchen with this item in my hand that’s not necessary for life on any level, I felt anger and disappointment rising in me again. I don’t want to be a person that gets sucked into believing I need Ziploc bags when so many others live lives of suffering every day not getting their basic needs met. In that moment I remembered what God is teaching me through encounters like these and others: be grateful in everything, and in everything you do, do it all for the glory of God. He also reminded me that he fought for my freedom once too; when He sent his son to die on the cross for me so that I could have the gift of life every day. This is a freedom and a gift that I must keep in perspective as an undeserved privilege every day. I need to be grateful and keep a heart willing to give up everything for the sake of following Him or helping others. And lastly, I need to keep in perspective that generosity, gratefulness, thankfulness, greed, selfishness and more, are individual to every person. I can’t forcefully change people around me. I can only willingly change me, hope it reflects to those around me, and then in turn, willingly changes them.
I still want to be a better steward of what I own and what I spend my money on. I want to be someone that puts into action the verse “it is better to give than to receive” (Acts 20:35). This is happening a little at a time as I continue to seek full surrender and an attitude like that of Paul, who gave up everything, and not like that of the man of Matthew 19:16, who was more concerned with what he owned than following Jesus. Or the woman that gave all she had to live on in Mark 12:41-44 and even though it was less than others had given, in the eyes of God, it was more. There is always something to be grateful for and generous with. Generosity and gratitude take practice. Greed and ungratefulness will leave us unsatisfied and alone.
I went on mission trips with the intention of impacting the people there but the truth is, I think it impacted me more than it impacted them.
The day I went into the nail salon, I was just there to get my nails done but walked out with a gift that I didn’t even know I needed to be given.
How can you adapt the attitude of gratitude in your circumstances?
Where do you tend to complain?
How can you help others in your community or around the world that aren’t as privileged?
List 10 things right now that you are grateful for and give God thanks for allowing you to enjoy them.
Identify areas where you can give more and then pray God gives you a willing heart in this area to give.
By Kari Dickson
